There is a new article up for your perusal on my article page - simply click on the link to read On the Challenges of Being a Stay-at-Home Mom.

When I was younger and before I had any children, I watched as my older sister became a stay at home mother. I saw many of the same changes in her that I find in myself now - the loss of outside friends and interests as we are so busy in household work; the lack of interest in outside activities leading to less confidence in the ability to have adult conversations as well as a loss of topics on which to fluently converse. I think the ability to prevent this is rare, since it requires such a difficult balancing act. Also the reality is that we are often raised to be the nurturing caregivers and sacrifice self for the needs of our families. I never thought I would be that kind of woman, and certainly don’t feel we live in that kind of “traditional” household - and yet there is a tremendous amount of guilt at wanting more out of life than changing diapers, keeping the house clean and folding laundry.

Which brings me to my next point: as dismal as it might be, it is a sad fact and reality that in choosing to have children and being at home with them, we are also making a decision to essentially end our careers. Choosing to stay at home with your children is seen as putting your life on hold - living on the sidelines while we tend to our families. We are viewed as not being serious about our chosen professions (nevermind that I went to school for six years part time and working full time to get my degree) - and as such might not be chosen for the management positions, or overlooked altogether when we try to return to the workforce.  Call me a “have my cake and eat it too” kind of gal, but I don’t think it has to be this way. I think we as women need to redefine our roles - yes it’s a time away from the workplace in which we need to keep abreast of changes, keep contacts and actively seek out employers who understand.  Then again, if the workplace were more amenable to flexibility and the importance of raising one’s family, perhaps it wouldn’t have to be so.